It’s true, we only have 100 days until THE BIG DAY. Don’t tell me that it is too soon to begin thinking about Christmas. It’s just the time to start working on lists and recipes and crafts. Here’s a list of 100 things I have to get done before December 25th.
100. Buy Christmas Socks, wear to work. Wear again to work in April when laundry has not been done in a week.
99. Drink Egg Nog
98. Learn How to wrap presents like an adult and stop lying that The Max wrapped them
97. Visit a mall Santa
96. Carol or at least sing “Last Christmas” by Wham at karaoke night
95. Knit a scarf for someone, a whole scarf without giving up and making yet another washcloth
94. Play in the snow, if by chance there is not snow, drive to Duluth
93. Drink a peppermint latte
92. Bake cookies, freeze cookies, forget they were there until February.
91. Use the threat of Santa at least twice a day for good behavior.
90. Go see any random churches Children’s Christmas pageant, they are all the same and all humorous
89. Buy at least one plush toy that sings when you squeeze it’s paw.
88. See at minimum 5 Rankin Bass specials.
87. Purchase 64 dollars worth of Christmas scented candles and burn them all before Thanksgiving.
86. Wear footed jammies.
85. Buy Christmas cards and address them immediately. Then put them next to the cards from last year still sitting on top the microwave.
84. Eat a Candy Cane
83. Scratch my initials on fake window snow at the grocery store.
82. Make hot chocolate for max after a day of sledding. Use marshmallows. Call them snowman poo.
81. Search youtube for old classic McDonald’s Christmas commercials.
80. Watch the Macy’s parade and freak out when Santa appears.
79. Attend opening night of the Hollidazzle parade.
78. Wear a Santa hat at least once to work.
77. Wear a Grinch hat at least once to work.
76. Search for three hours for a gift for my brother-in-laws, end up giving socks.
75. Buy a tin of tri-flavored popcorn for someone who I know will share.
74. Listen to the XE Christmas jukebox
73. Listen to Delilah.
72. Think about New Years resolutions, and remember that I never make any.
71. Try very hard to resist putting decorations up until after Thanksgiving, crack about the 14th of November.
70. Buy my first ever real tree, being as the old fake tree fell apart last year.
69. Bake Yulekake bread from my great-grandma’s Scandinavian recipe
68. Make popcorn garland
67. Listen to my father’s story about how my great-grandpa took over being Santa Claus.
66. Repeat the story to Max.
65. Bake peanut butter cookies with Hershey’s kisses.
64. Eat them
63. Call my great aunt
62. Become over-amped when the advent calender starts.
61. Celebrate my birthday, love the fact that it’s during the holiday season.
60. Drink some rum and cider.
59. Watch “It’s a Wonderful Life”
58. Wish I was participating in Black Friday, while pouring coffee for customers who are.
57. Buy a poinsettia
56. Read Martha’s December issue…34 times
55. Have Max write Santa a letter.
54. Write Santa one myself
53. Drive at least one place where I have to turn back because of too much snow.
52. Go ice skating
51. Bake a pumpkin pie.
50. lay under the tree and look up at the lights.
49. Take a walk in the snow.
48. Drive around neighborhoods with terrific light displays
47. Pay through the nose for Christmas Break Daycare
46. Buy Mistletoe
45. Eat Little Debbie holiday trees.
44. Vow to only take one peice of Fudge.
43. Take 17.
42. Get stomachache
41. Play boardgames with the family.
40. Sing the twelve days of Christmas, wonder who wanted “French Hens”?
39. But stocking stuffers in Targets dollars bins.
38. Scrape that last bit of mascara from the nearly dried out tube, because Mom will give me mascara in MY stocking.
37. Miss my grandpa and grandma
36. Over dress The Max for social outings, because I was always overdressed for social outings.
35. Receive and love the cards sent to me.
34. Skip work one day to go to the mall.
33. Buy a snappy top to wear to Christmas parties.
32. Watch Chip and Dale climb through the Christmas tree.
31. Hang a wreath on my front door.
30. Drink Jones Holiday Sodas.
29. Regret it.
28. Follow Santa’s Sleigh Sky Watch on the radio.
27. Wish I had a yard to put plastic reindeer
26. Give the bell ringing Santa a buck, maybe more, maybe less.
25. Check out the 25 Days of Christmas show list on the Family Channel, or wherever it is nowadays.
24. Blog at least 16 times about the holidays.
23. Eat prime rib.
22. Hope I am creating as many Christmas memories for Max as my parents did for me.
21. Get some red and green dishes.
20. Make Rudolf ornaments
19. Say HO! HO! HO! at random, on the elevator, when the creepy guy is riding.
18. Clean up non-stop falling needles
17. Dye my hair red and green striped.
16. Make snow angels
15. Sit for an hour at the Christmas porcelain town display and wonder what the little people are doing inside.
14. See a live showing of “A Christmas Carol”
13. Eat more fudge, wash it down with more eggnog…this time spiked.
12. Buy a holiday blend of coffee beans.
11. Watch “Miracle on 34th Street” but only the black and white version.
10. Make a poorly constructed gingerbread house and eat it when it’s still soft.
9. Read Luke Chapter 2
8. Tie red bows on everything
7. Buy max something too expensive, that I know he’ll love
6. Get pictures done for Christmas cards
5. Explain how Santa gets into apartments
4. Buy unshelled mixed nuts
3. Ask my dad what he wants, knowing his response will be “world peace”
2. Love every minute of the season.
1. Crash in a pile of wrapping paper on Christmas night and hope the next 265 days go by really fast.