Top 7 Suburban Stereotypes

I live in the suburbs now, so it’s okay if I poke jokes at them, right?  I’m going to either way.  Whenever I have lived in small towns or large cities, people always mock the ‘burbs.  While I was in the process of securing this place, I had one friend say to me, ” I know black people that won’t even go to ______!! (the blank equals my new town)  Well, judgment aside, I love my new yard, a suburb staple.  And there is a really nice family across the street, who happen to be black.  But let’s go back to mocking the smaller towns surrounding major metropolitan cities!

7. People are…larger.

I will say, the grocery stores here do seem to be better stocked with staple items like Hamburger Helper and gigantic boxes of pizza rolls.  There’s more restaurants of the fast food variety than any other.  I guess I have not really taken a good look at the girth of the locals.

6. Men drive trucks, women drive minivans/SUVs.

This IS something that is probably on the truer side. Also, people are more into cars here it does seem.  For the first time ever feel a little self-conscious of the car that an ex-boyfriend’s mother referred to as  a POS.  But I like my POS, and am a little too broke to buy a new one at the time.

5. People Are Less Cultured

Well, duh.  People will be less cultured where there is less diversity and, uh, culture.

4. It’s nothing but chain businesses and strip malls.

DING DING DING DING!!  So spot on.  Actually, there is an old downtown here, that has been maintained fairly well.  There are many mom and pop stores still in business from when I was a very little girl.  But, less than a mile away is the most confusing huge area of strip malls with virtually every chain store known to Americans.  Seriously, name one, it is probably there.

3. The Houses all Look the Same

I guess.  It depends on the neighborhood you are in.  My house looks the same as the next two, but different than the ten or so on the next block.  Then again, those ten all look the same. I still turn into the right driveway every time.

2. People Don’t Walk

I think this may be true as well.  Unless it’s for exercise I don’t see people using their feet to commute places.  Of course, that does not include the black clad high school students.  They always walk in packs.

1.  People are much more conservative

I had no idea.  I tried to find the presidential election results from the city I live.  Didn’t  fine ’em.  My guess is that this is true, but only cause the TV tells me so.

About kristiane

killing spiders with my laser eyes.
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18 Responses to Top 7 Suburban Stereotypes

  1. I’m going to beat Bill by saying “[insert a The Burbs quote here]” 🙂

  2. JodhC says:

    I sympathize, I really do, I grew up in the suburbs.
    It wasn’t fun.

  3. stephanie says:

    go check out the old highschool. there is many more portables there now. it looks much less intimidating now!

  4. dailytri says:

    Welcome to the ‘burbs. I’ve lived in an outer ring for nine years and can’t wait to move into Minneapolis once my youngest graduates from high school. But that’s just me.

  5. Amy says:

    I think it’s all what you make of it, wherever you live. Plenty of goods and bads with both. I personally miss being able to walk to a bar or restaurant, but I do like having a driveway and not having to find parking in winter.

  6. Anonymous says:

    You have to have Kids and a family to be accepted in the suburbs

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